"When I was growing up, NOBODY had food allergies!"

This is a statement that most of us who have or care for someone with food allergies, hears all of the time. From my experience, this usually is delivered two ways. One comes from a sympathetic friend or relative as they have a genuine look of concern on their face. The other comes from a person that says it in a way that suggests that we are all crazy and making something out of nothing. This is the response that gets my blood boiling.

Recently, I have encountered this reaction twice. One person, even rolled their eyes. We were discussing a mutual friend who has a few allergies but whose children has extensive food allergies. This person whom I was speaking to does not know about my particular situation so I felt like they were being even more honest with their response. Which is disturbing. And we were talking about true allergies, as diagnosed by a doctor, not some imagined dislike for a food. Even if we had been discussing a food intolerance, the reaction was completely unfair and cold.

It seems that we all have an uphill battle that we are fighting. It adds insult to injury when people treat our disease as if it were not real. Just because food allergies were not formerly as prevalent as they are now, does not make them any less significant. And they are on the rise. In my world, they seem to be increasing daily. Sadly, more and more people are contacting me and calling me seeking support and what little advice I can give. It is so painful to hear all of the stories and to know how difficult this situation is for so many. And often we are not talking about one or two food allergies, now it seems that people have a list of things that could kill them or make them very sick. Again, I am so thankful to have access to a forum like this blog and many of those that I follow.

People tend to assume is that our children are allergic because we have food allergies. Again, this is not always the case. I think that people do not want to accept that something needs to be done. People are getting sick. Ignorance is no longer bliss. Is it environmental? Is it the medications that we take? Is it the overuse of pesticides? Could it be caused by over processed food? There are no answers but I hope that someday, we will have a cause. And people are going to have to wake up to what is going on in the world.

Until then, gravitate to those who show genuine compassion. And do not get hurt feelings by those who are wearing blinders. Hopefully, education is the key to ending all of this insanity!

Nothing new to report...

So all of that dreading I did yesterday was unnecessary. Our doctor wanted to give Milo his Hib vaccine and opted to wait on the MMR. She didn't want him to get too many shots today. So we will have to return sometime before he turns 2 in October. Phew! Well, sort of.

She wants me to reconsider the whole Titer's test. She said that she is almost certain that Ella will need the booster, regardless. So rather than putting her through both annoyances, why not just get the booster? Well, I was was not convinced. She tried with all of her might but was unable to sway me. I told her that I would need to discuss everything with my husband; let him make the decision that I am too afraid to make. So we talked about it and he has decided that she SHOULD get the booster. We both really trust our doctor. She is amazing. She has been pretty spot on with everything about the children and since she feels that this booster is so important, even considering Ella's situation, we feel like we should take notice. I will still be praying that this is the right thing, but it helps to have a partner is decisive in this matter. The fact is that there are often outbreaks in our area of the diseases that the vaccine is meant to protect the kids from. It is all a lot like playing craps in Vegas. Fingers are crossed that everything will be okay (again...)

Hopefully I will soon get back to my regular blog entries, and steer this away from the MMR forum that it has turned into. Thank you for reading, nonetheless...

Dreading tomorrow...

The kids will be visiting their pediatrician tomorrow. Milo is getting his 18 month check up (even though he is 20 months old) and Ella is getting her 4 year old check up. As I mentioned before, Ella is due for her MMR booster but since she had such a horrific reaction to her first MMR I have asked the doctor to give her a Titer's test to confirm that she does indeed need this booster. She is going to send us to the lab to have blood drawn for the test. Fingers are crossed that she will not need the shot. And Milo is overdue for his first MMR. I have been waiting as long as possible for this one. All I have been doing is going back and forth about whether or not it is a good idea for him to be immunized with this vaccine. There is so much controversy surrounding this particular shot. And since Ella has such severe allergies, I am always looking for a direct cause. Her reaction was so severe that I almost rushed her to the emergency room. Extremely high temperatures and a measles-like rash all over her abdomen and arms, a week after receiving the vaccine.

As horrible as that was I remain a person who believes in vaccinating her children. I have a friend who lost his 2 year old to the flu. She had not gotten a flu vaccine that year. While it is true that vaccines are never a sure thing, they are our best chance of protecting against nasty bugs.

As a parent, I am always questioning every decision that I make. I have to fight back tears as I hold my children when they get shots. It is something that gets worse as time goes on, not better. As it is happening, I pray that what I am doing is the best thing for my child. My job is to protect them, after all. "Please make this the right thing. Please do not let this harm them. Don't you dare cry, Heidi!" These are the thoughts that loop in my head, as I wait for the painful scream. Oh, I am truly a wimp. Most times, my children surprise me. They often look at the administering nurse with a defiant look, "Is that all you got?" And then we get our reward prize and go on with our day. But this one is different. I know that the stakes are high. Hopefully Milo's body chemistry with have no issue with the vaccine and there will be no side effects. Needless to say I am saying my prayers before bed tonight. Please don't let this hurt my baby...

Singulair Update

Two family friends are allergists and we told them about Ella's depressed behavior and how we think it might be a side effect of Singulair. Both said that we should take her off of it but suggested that we keep her on the Zyrtec. It might take a week or two before we see a lessening of the effects. By that time we are scheduled to see a new doctor who is treating a friend's child for extreme food allergies and asthma. I am interested to see if this doctor has a different approach than her current allergist. She does more elaborate testing (including genetic testing) and also focuses on vitamin therapies. I just want to make sure that we are as informed about Ella's situation as possible! Details to come...

Could all of this be a side effect?

Recently, Ella was prescribed more allergy medication. In addition to her daily dose of Zyrtec, her doctor thought that it would be a good idea for us to also have her take Singulair. Lately, she has been an emotional wreck. Frequently talking about death and constantly focusing on negative subjects. I have been told that raising a 4 year old can be 10x more difficult than a 2 year old, with constant boundary testing. But lately, things have been REALLY challenging. We have jokingly been referring to Ella as "Liz", as if she were a melodramatic character in a classic Liz Taylor film. When she goes to "the dark place" it is pretty horrible. She recently learned about death and it has been something that she is transfixed on. My Mom's beloved dog, Crystal, became quite ill during one of our recent visits and they had to put her to sleep while we were there. Ella's Great Grandmother also passed recently, as did my cousin. So there has been a lot of hushed conversation about very sad details that we have tried to shelter Ella from, none of which she has missed. But her interest in depressing topics have been escalating over the past month. She has been having tantrums again, which she has not had in over a year. She has also been complaining of random leg pains.



One of my fellow Twitter pals recently posted a link to an article about new FDA warnings about Singulair (thank you, Gina Clowes). Turns out, the stuff can sometimes cause depression. So my husband and I did what all doctors suggest that you not do and did some Internet research. Turns out, many children also have the same depression issues as Ella, including the leg pains. So we are going to take her off of the drug starting tomorrow.

I am not some crazy reactionary. But Ella has truly not been herself lately. And it worries me. So we are going to try this and see. Hopefully, she will go back to being her lovely and happy self. And soon...

Note to Restaurants: In this economy, it pays to make your customers happy!

The other day I had a bit of a confrontation with a girl who works at a restaurant that we frequent. I am NOT a confrontational person, so this got my heart racing more than I care to admit. Basically, I called up our local Baja Fresh to place an order for pick up. I ordered everything that we normally get... steak tacos with just meat and lettuce, 2 fish tacos, chicken tortilla soup, rice, black beans, and cheese quesadillas with corn tortillas. When I got to the quesadillas, the "lovely" girl on the other end of the phone told me that I could only get them with flour tortillas. When I told her that we ALWAYS get them with corn tortillas (at least 20 times from the same location) she told me that it was impossible, they simply could not, would not make them for me with corn. The tone of her voice, the silence in between her brash statements all told me that she clearly thought that I was a lunatic. ( Correct me if I am wrong, you have a stack of flour tortillas and a stack of corn tortillas sitting right next to each other and you are telling me that it is IMPOSSIBLE for you to make a substitution?) This was the dark side of corporate American dining at its best. I felt like I was talking to an angry robot, impervious to reason. Complicating the situation was the fact that I was on my speaker phone in the car, winding my way through the Hollywood Hills. Thankfully, a higher power took action and disconnected my call. After a few deep breaths, I pulled the car over and hit redial. This time, I asked to speak to a manager. After MUCH apologizing and tushie kissing, I was redeemed. They would be HAPPY to make our quesadilla, as requested. We even got a free order of chips and guacamole out of the ordeal!

I used to help my dad run his restaurant in San Luis Obispo. The very first rule in any business is MAKE THE CUSTOMER HAPPY. And with the economy being what it is, every single restaurant and cafe that is lucky enough to still be in business should be bending over to make everyone as happy as they possibly can. That includes proper employee training. (As in, tell your new hires that if a customer asks for something that you are not sure about have them ask a manager.) There used to be a character on Seinfeld called "The Soup Nazi". This was a guy that served up soup, his way. That attitude may have been chic in the 90's but those days are long gone. If I am willing to go out and spend precious cash at your establishment, I want it to be a pleasant experience. If it isn't, chances are that I will not be retuning with my family. So work with us!

And if you happen to have or are caring for someone with allergies do not hesitate to make your requests. It can be a little intimidating sometimes, but it sure is wonderful to have someone else cook dinner every now and again. And if anybody gives you attitude tell them that your wallet was made for walking!

New Bandages for people like me to avoid

I just read about these bandages that are made from the shells of shellfish. Sounds like a horrible situation that I will be quite happy to avoid!